Truth, Tall Tales, Tweets and Trips
D.O.G.E. brings Burning Man to 1600 Pennsylvania
Elon Musk managed to convince his old buddy running the Secret Service, who surprisingly agreed. "Think of it as an extended vacation for the President," he said. "I promise we'll have him back before he runs out of golf stories."
With the director of the Secret Service on board, they devised a plan as reckless as it was daring. Disguises, realistic Men in Black, and glitter—a lot of glitter. "Just tell them he's an eccentric billionaire on his first acid trip," Elon instructed with a wink. Watching usually serious agents donning turbans and steampunk shades and smearing themselves with face paint was a trip on its own.
Out to the Desert
The orange-hued leader of the free world was bubbling with excitement as they rolled into Black Rock City in a van plastered with psychedelic stickers and blasting techno music. "This is going to be tremendous!" he exclaimed. "I can already tell I'm going to win Burning Man!"
Once inside the festival grounds, they were greeted by a sea of colorful costumes, art installations that looked like they were designed by someone on an acid trip (which they probably were), and people dancing like nobody was watching—because they literally weren't.
Elon took POTUS aside and whispered, "You want to really experience this? I have something special." He pulled out a tiny gummy.
"Isn't that a drug?" Trump asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Only if you get caught," Elon replied with a mischievous grin.
With the Secret Service keeping watch (albeit distracted by their bewilderment), Trump took the dare. Both men mounted bikes and launched off into the setting sun. Moments later, they were on a wild ride in Albert Hoffman's bicycle tracks.
Suddenly, they found themselves surrounded by naked women dancing under the stars. "This is what I call making America great again!" The big man shouted as he twirled around like a kid in a candy store, glitter flying off his hair.
Then came enlightenment: Trump met God—or someone dressed like Him. "You're doing great things down there," God said in a booming voice that echoed through the desert. "But maybe lay off tariffs?"
"I'll consider it," Trump replied earnestly before getting distracted by a nearby art installation shaped like a giant taco.
The taco was a colorful, makeshift tent in Moroccan style, adorned with vibrant tapestries and twinkling lights—or maybe they were candles. To the sounds of distant music and laughter, the great man seated himself with Musk, Vivek Ramaswamy, God (in a surprisingly casual outfit), and other burners, including Leon Simons, the Dutch climate scientist. Each was given a drink that glowed in the twinkling lights.
Go to the Light
Trump: (leaning back with a grin) “You know, folks, this is the best place to be! Who needs the Oval Office? When can you have this? Look at all this open space! I could build a luxury hotel right here!”
Musk: (nodding enthusiastically) “Absolutely! Imagine a solar-powered resort with a direct link to Mars! We could call it ‘Donald's Cosmic Retreat.’"
Ramaswamy: (chiming in) “We could market it as the ultimate wellness experience. ‘Get enlightened while you're on vacation!’”
Musk: (grinning) “I love it! ‘Mind Expansion Mondays!' We could even livestream it on X—everyone would tune in to watch politicians get enlightened!”
Trump: (laughing) “Can you imagine? ‘Truth Social Trips Live: The Art of the Dose!’ I'd get ratings like never before!”
God: (leaning back thoughtfully) “But remember, true enlightenment comes with Humility. It's about what you can achieve and how you connect with others.”
Musk: (excitedly) “Yes! Think of it as an upgraded navigation system that helps you avoid the potholes of history while steering toward new horizons!”
Ramaswamy: “And who knows? Maybe this is what America needs—a little psychedelic wisdom mixed with political strategy!”
God: (smiling) “You humans have such interesting ideas about enlightenment. But tell me, what do you really seek? Is it power, fame, or something deeper?”
Trump: (pausing thoughtfully) “Well, I mean… power is nice. Fame is good for business. But I AM the greatest President ever!”
God: “And those words—"I am"—are the most potent magic I have given you. Jahweh! Jehovah! I am!”
Simons: (leaning forward) “But what if greatness isn't about being remembered? What if it's about pushing humanity forward? Imagine if we could unlock the universe's secrets through our actions here and now!”
Ramaswamy: (enthusiastically) “Now that's profound! Imagine bridging the gap between politics and spirituality. We could have "Psychedelic Policy Sessions”—PPS—where we explore new ideas while tripping!”
Under the Stars
As they continued their acid-laced banter under the shimmering lights of Burning Man, each reflected on his own journey—balancing ambition with introspection, power with connection. The tent becomes a cauldron of ideas swirling in the desert air, where laughter mingles with insight and every word carries the weight of possibility.
God: “Suffering is indeed part of the human experience. It serves as a catalyst for growth and understanding. Through adversity, you learn resilience and empathy. It's how you choose to respond that defines your path.”
Trump: (raising an eyebrow) “So you're saying I should embrace my failures? Like when they stole the election?”
God: (smiling gently) “Yes, Donald. Every setback is an opportunity for reflection and learning. Embrace those moments; they can lead to profound insights about yourself and others.”
Musk: (excitedly) “This is like a startup philosophy! Fail fast, learn faster! But on a cosmic scale!”
Ramaswamy: (grinning) “I thought politics was all about winning! Maybe it's really about evolving!”
God: (with warmth) “Precisely! Life is not a zero-sum game. It's a journey of evolution—individually and collectively. Each choice contributes to the greater good.”
Trump: (smirking) “So I should be more truthful on Truth Social? That might be tough!”
God: (laughing) “Compassion can take many forms—even humor can bridge divides. But remember, authenticity matters more than perfection.”
Musk: (pondering) “This makes me think about innovation, too. We must collaborate across boundaries to create a better future—just as we do here.”
God: “Exactly! Innovation thrives in diversity of thought and experience. Fireworks are more creative than fishing nets! Embrace different perspectives; they enrich your understanding of Reality.”
Simons: "Reality, you say? Gentlemen, we must confront the Reality of drastic shifts in extreme weather. We cannot afford to ignore interconnected systems. The pace of change is accelerating faster than the models predicted. In just the last three decades, we've seen the rate of sea level rise double. Our window for intervention is closing.”
As he grasped this insight, Trump understood that the fear he wielded to manipulate voters into living mundane lives was the cause of his own struggle with public perception and criticism. If only briefly, this caused him to confront his inner fears of vulnerability and inauthenticity. As they sat together in the tent under the shimmering lights of Burning Man, each group member absorbed God's insights on Reality—realizing that their journeys were part of something far more significant.
Ramaswamy: (excitedly) “And let's not forget the potential for political change! If leaders embrace these ideas, we could reshape society for the better.”
Trump: (grinning mischievously) “So you're saying I could be the psychedelic President? ‘Make America Trip Again?’”
Simons: (laughing) “Just keep your feet on the ground!”
God: (smiling warmly) “In every journey of exploration, remember that Humility is essential. Recognize your limits and learn from each other.”
Trump: (leaning back confidently) “Humility? That's not really my style! But I do like the sound of ‘Enlightened President.’ I'll put it on my next campaign poster!”
Musk: (laughing) “Don't forget to include a rocket ship in the design!”
Ramaswamy: “And perhaps a giant mushroom, symbolizing growth and transformation!”
Back to the Oval
In a lavishly decorated Oval Office with gold accents and a giant portrait of Trump glaring down from the wall, the air was thick with the scent of fast food and the faint sound of a news channel blaring in the background. Donald Trump sat at the Resolute Desk, flipping through a stack of papers. When he returned to Reality (or whatever you call it), he was changed—transformed into something more than just the President. With Elon's guidance and Doctor Oz's ministrations, the President began mainlining a daily cocktail of psilocybin, mescaline and ketamine.
At first, it seemed harmless enough. He'd stroll through the White House corridors with blissful confidence. "I'm like Lincoln but cooler!" he'd declare to anyone who would listen. But soon enough, things took a turn for the bizarre.
As his narcissistic tendencies blossomed into full-blown megalomania, paranoia began creeping in as well. He started seeing ghosts—specifically those of past presidents—who would whisper advice or critique his policies late at night.
"Why is Jefferson haunting me?" Trump would mutter as he wandered through the White House at 3 AM. The portraits lining the walls began to speak to him. "You're doing it all wrong!" one would shout as he passed. "Try not being you for once!” said another.
Elon Musk assumed the role of Henry Kissinger in this strange political theater—whispering sweet nothings into Trump's ear while simultaneously redirecting Pentagon money to SpaceX and Neurolink. He and Trump would sit together in the Oval Office, discussing world affairs while munching on microdoses like they were gummy bears.
"Let's make Mars great again!" Musk would enthuse.
"Can we build a wall around it?" Trump replied without missing a beat.
What Bobby Knew
Media coverage of Donald Trump's sudden interest in psychedelics was a mix of intrigue, skepticism, and humor. At first, the President's party went along with the changes they saw because they polled well with a populace easily bored. Musk's ability to rally social media amplified the novelty.
Trump's new pastime coincided with a broader trend among some Republican governors and senators who had invested in the emergent cannabis and psilocybin trade and now advocated for its expansion out of self-interest. Texas Governor Rick Perry supported giving psychedelics to veterans, a 180-degree shift from when the GOP criminalized drugs to suppress the counterculture of the 1960s.
The President began to think he might have something more in common with his HHS Secretary, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., who had criticized the FDA for suppressing psychedelic therapies, so he invited the younger man to dine with him in the residence.
Trump: (leaning back in his chair) “Bobby! You know, I've been thinking about this whole microdosing thing. It's tremendous! Just a little sprinkle of magic mushrooms to get the creative juices flowing, right?”
RFK Jr.: (chuckling) “Well, I suppose it's better than what I did in high school. You know, I started with LSD and ended up on Heroin.”
Trump: (raising an eyebrow) “Heroin? That's a bit extreme, don't you think? I mean, I like to keep things classy—like my steaks; well done!”
RFK Jr.: (smirking) “Classy? Sure. But let me tell you, when I was on Heroin, I went from failing grades to the top of my class! Who knew addiction could be so… productive?”
Trump: (nodding) “So you're saying I should try Heroin instead? It sounds like it really worked for you!”
RFK Jr.: (laughs) “No, no! That's not the lesson here. It worked for a while, but then it hollows out your life. You end up talking to ghosts—like your old buddy Nixon!”
Trump: (grinning) “Nixon? He was a great guy! Always had the best ideas—Watergate was just a misunderstanding!”
RFK Jr.: (rolling his eyes) “Right. And speaking of misunderstandings, how do you feel about your own little ‘mind-altering’ experiment? Microdosing sounds like a fancy way of saying you're just trying to avoid reality.”
Trump: (leaning forward) “Reality? Bobby, I create my own Reality! Microdosing is just another tool in my toolkit—like Truth Social or that time I suggested injecting bleach!”
RFK Jr.: (laughs) “Now, that's some real alternative medicine. But seriously—what do you hope to achieve with all this?”
Trump: (smirking) “Well, think about it! Suppose I can convince people I'm enlightened and connected to the universe. In that case, they'll forget all about golden showers and the Access Hollywood tape. Plus, imagine the headline: ‘Trump Discovers Inner Peace!’”
RFK Jr.: (nodding) “Inner peace? Sounds great! But what happens when you start seeing ghosts of past presidents? You might think they're giving you policy advice!”
Trump: (waving his hand dismissively) “Ghosts? Please! The only ghost I want to see is George Washington telling me how great I am!”
RFK Jr.: (grinning) “Good luck with that! But remember what happened to me—I thought I could control everything until brain worms took over. You might be in a similar predicament if you're not careful.”
Trump: (leaning back again) “Look, Bobby, if this microdosing thing helps me win the youth vote, it's worth it. I’ll be president forever. Besides, what's the worst that could happen?”
RFK Jr.: (smirking) “You could end up in a wellness camp for ‘re-parenting,’ which sounds like something out of a bad reality show.”
Trump: (laughs heartily) “‘The Real Housewives of Camp David!’ Now that's a show I'd produce!”
RFK Jr.: (shaking his head)” Just remember: moderation is key. You don't want to end up talking about your feelings to portraits at 3 AM.”
Trump: (grinning widely) “Oh please! If I start talking to portraits, they better be flattering! Say… how did you know…?”
The two laugh as Trump leans back confidently in his chair while RFK Jr. shakes his head at the absurdity of their conversation. But even as he laughs, Trump looks at RFK Jr. with a curious side stare.
The Cabinet Coup
In general, social media reactions are mixed, with many expressing disbelief at Trump's newfound interest in psychedelics. Memes and satiric jokes proliferate online and in late-night monologues, depicting Trump as a psychedelic guru and poking fun at his changing office decor.
Overall, media coverage of Trump's interest in psychedelics reveals a complex interplay between politics, health care reform, cultural shifts, and public perception. Still, as time passes and Trump's behavior grows increasingly erratic—talking to non-existent phantoms in meetings and insisting on wearing sunglasses indoors—the Cabinet begins to worry. They convene one fateful evening over pizza and beer (because what else do you do when your boss is losing it?).
"We need to do something," Vice President Vance said seriously. "He thinks he's God now."
"Maybe we should just let him believe that," one Cabinet member suggested between pepperoni pizza bites.
"No! We need to take action!" Vance insisted. So they devised a plan: vote him out under the special provisions of the 25th Amendment.
In an unprecedented move reminiscent of Nixon's final days, the Cabinet gathered for an emergency meeting. Each member cast their vote with somber expression.
When it came time for Vance to announce the results, he stood up dramatically: "By unanimous vote of this Cabinet… we hereby declare that Donald J. Trump is no longer our president!"
Cheers erupted throughout the room as rubber chickens and confetti rained down from above (thanks to some clever planning from Vance).
The New Era Begins
With Trump officially out of office and Vance stepping in as President, the world breathed a sigh of relief.
Vance addressed the nation: "I promise no more ghostly encounters or unsolicited advice from portraits! We're going back to normalcy—whatever that means these days."
And as for Trump? He retreated into his world of microdoses and Truth Social rants—occasionally popping up at Burning Man with Elon by his side, both still convinced that they’re destined for greatness… or at least another wild bicycle ride under those desert stars.
In conclusion, sometimes all it takes is a little LSD and some naked dancing under the stars to remind us that life is absurd—and maybe that's not such a bad thing after all.
DISCLAIMER: This essay was initiated by Perplexity Pro AI with the following prompt: "Write a 2500-word science fiction story in which Elon Musk quietly sneaks Donald Trump and his Secret Service detail into Burning Man and doses the President with LSD. After an ecstatic experience involving naked women and a meeting with God, Trump becomes a confirmed microdoser of a daily cocktail that Musk slips to him in the Oval Office."
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#RestorationGeneration.
當人類被關在籠内，地球持續美好，所以，給我們的教訓是:
人類毫不重要，空氣，土壤，天空和流水没有你們依然美好。
所以當你們走出籠子的時候，請記得你們是地球的客人，不是主人。
When humans are locked in a cage, the earth continues to be beautiful. Therefore, the lesson for us is: Human beings are not important. The air, soil, sky and water are still beautiful without you. So, when you step out of the cage, please remember that you are guests of the Earth, not its hosts.
We have a complete solution. We can restore whales to the ocean and bison to the plains. We can recover all the great old-growth forests. We possess the knowledge and tools to rebuild savannah and wetland ecosystems. It is not too late. All of these great works are recoverable. We can have a human population sized to harmonize, not destabilize. We can have an atmosphere that heats and cools just the right amount, is easy on our lungs and sweet to our nostrils with the scent of ten thousand flowers. All of that beckons. All of that is within reach.